Saturday, April 16, 2011

Deathly Hallows: Part I

I did this during the ORIGINAL BEDA when Twilight came out on DVD. Since then I always update my facebook status with commentary and quotes about Twilight or Harry Potter when I'm watching them at home.  Today I decided to spare my facebook friends and make it into a blog post instead :)


DEATHLY HALLOWS: PART I
Live blogged by Allison

Bellatrix: I wanna kill the boy! *wags tail*
Voldemort: No! Bad Bella!
Bellatrix: *pouts*

Hedwig: *defends Harry*
Audience: NOOOOOOOO! :(

Announcer: And here comes Lord Voldemort, wearing a Smoke Monster original.
Voldemort: *struts* *flies*
(I wanted to insert a picture of smokey!Voldemort flying, but my computer won't let me do a screencap while playing a DVD. Stupid copyright crap.)

George: *lays on couch*
Fred: How you feeling, Georgie?
Audience: FREEEEEEEEED :'-(

Harry: *leaves Burrow in the middle of the night*
Ron: *follows after in pajamas* Going somewhere?
Audience: Ron! *drools*

Ginny: Zip me up, will you?
Harry: Um, heck yes I will.
Both: *snogs*

Minister: Oh yeah, Dumbledore gave you the Sword of Gryffindor, too, but you can't have it! Na na na na boo boo! *sticks out tongue*
Hermione: But it belongs to Harry! It came to him!
Minister: Too bad. Also, we can't find it. So, yeah.

Luna: *is adorable*
Xenophilius: *is weird*
Harry: *stares at symbol on X's chest*

Auntie Muriel: Bathilda Bagshot!
Harry: Who?
Auntie Muriel: What, don't you pay attention in History?
Harry and all students everywhere: *snorts* Right.

Death Eaters and Trio: *destroy coffee shop*
Waitress: Uhhhh?

Door: Regulus Arcturus Black
Trio: Huh. That door has the same initials as R.A.B. . . . THE DOOR IS RAB???

Death Eaters: *search train*
Neville: Hey, losers! He isn't here.
Audience: Yeeeah, Neville! *pumps fist*

Ron: *plays piano*
Hermione: *giggles* *corrects*
Harry: *rolls eyes*

Dobby: *wrestles with Mundungus Fletcher* Oh, hi, Harry!

Kreacher: *tries to get a word in edgewise*
Dobby: *shoves out of way*
Audience: Dobbbbbyyyyyyyy :-(

Mundungus: Look, that's her!
Trio: *stares at picture in revulsion*
Pic of Umbridge: *giggles* *waves*

Toilet: FEEEEED MEEEE.
Harry and Ron: *step into toilets, flush*

Harry-as-Runcorn: *walks with a funny little hop in his step*
Everyone else: *doesn't notice*

Mary: *kisses Ron-as-Reginald*
Ron: Uhhhh...
Real Reginald: O.o

Hermione: You can get going on the tent.
Harry: Where are we supposed to find a tent?
Hermione's bag: *sit there, looks innocent*

Roommate who hasn't read the books: Wait, so what's the deal with Sirius's brother and that locket?
Allison: *explains*
Roommate: Man, you really HAVE to read these books, don't you?
Allison: DUH. :)

Harry: *hangs locket around neck* *touches locket* *sees creepy vision*
Frodo: Hey, that's MY line!

Harry: *is cranky*
Hermione: Take it off!
Audience: Whaaaat?

Hermione: *stares in horror*
Snatcher: *sniffs*
Hermione: Do I smell THAT bad?

Harry and Hermione: *walk down hill*
Ron: Angst!
Harry and Hermione: *share water bottle*
Ron: ANGST!
Harry and Hermione: *walk together*
Ron: AAANNGGGGGGGSTTTTTTT!!!!!

Hermione: The Sword of Gryffindor! It's goblin-made!
Harry and audience: Okaaaay...

Harry and Ron: *fight*
Hermione: Ugh! Boys.

Ron: *blows things out of proportion*
Audience: *sighs*

Harry: *dances with Hermione*
Harry/Hermione shippers: YESSSSSS!
Ron/Hermione shippers: It's a BROTHERLY dance!

Harry: *kisses Snitch*
Audience: Uhhhh...?

Hermione: *brushes snow off random gravestone only to reveal the weird symbol* Oh! Look! What a coinky-dink!

Creepy old woman: *walks up creepily*
Harry: I have a brilliant idea! Let's go WITH her!

Creepy old woman: *acts creepy*
Harry: So, what's up? Nice photo album. Who's this guy?

Creepy old woman: *speaks creepily* *turns into snake*
Harry: Aw, crap.

Snake: *flies through wall into perfectly clean and neat room child's bedroom*
Audience: Uhhh...?

Tiny ball of light: *appears in distance*
Harry: Oooh, shiny! *follows*

Harry: *takes clothes off*
Audience: *drools*

Harry: Dude, the Horcrux is lying! There's nothing between me and Hermione.

Ron: Oh. Good.
Harry/Hermione shippers: NOOOOOOOOO!
Ron/Hermione shippers: Hahaha! Take THAT, suckahs!

Ron: *comes back after weeks* *grins sheepishly* Hey.
Hermione: WHERE'S MY WAND, HARRY?

Ron: . . . then the little ball of light went into my chest, right here *indicated heart* and it brought me to you, Hermione.
Audience: AWWWWWW <3

Ron: Oh, hey, you need a wand, don't you?
Harry: Yeah...
Ron: *pulls out extra wand* Here you go!

Hermione: *says stuff*
Ron: Yeah! Hermione's right! Let's vote on it. *raises hand*

Harry: What's that symbol thingy?
Xenophilius: Well it's the sign of the Deathly Hallows, of course.
Harry: Hey, isn't that the title of this movie?

Hermione: So these brothers were traveling along a road at twilight.
Ron: Midnight. Mum always said midnight.
Hermione: *raises eyebrow*
Ron: Twilight's fine. Better, actually!
Audience: *laughs*

Ron: Death's got an invisibility cloak?
Director: Eh, we don't need that line. *cuts*
Audience: Noooooooooo :(

Xenophilius: So, yeah, those are the Deathly Hallows.
Harry: Uhh....?

Harry: *falls*
Hermione: *points wand, casts spell*
Audience: Uhhh...?

Draco: *stares at Harry*
Harry: *stares at Draco*
Draco/Harry shippers: YESSSSSSSS.
Everyone else: *groans*

Bellatrix: Put the boys in the cellar! I want to have a little chat with this one, GIRL TO GIRL!
Boys: *are thrown into cellar*
Bellatrix: So, like, what's going on with you and Ron.
Hermione: *sigh* Who KNOWS? Boys. Ugh.
Bellatrix: Tell me about it.

Dobby: *appears in cellar*
Harry: Dobby! You can Apparate in here?
Audience: DOBBYYYYYYYYY <3 :'-(

Random piece of hair: *falls onto Hermione's jacket*
Really smart audience members: FORESHADOWING!
The rest of us: Okay, that was random.

Bellatrix: WTF, Elf???
Dobby: DOBBY IS A FREE ELF!
Audience: DOBBBBYYYYYY :(

Trio, Dobby, Goblin: *Disapparate*
Bellatrix's knife: *follows*
Audience: DDDOOOOBBBBBBBBBBYYYYY :( :( :(

Voldemort: It's Friday, Friday, gotta get down on-- *sees audience* Oh. Er. . .  *looks for something evil to do* *desecrated Dumbledore's grave* Oh, hey! The Elder Wand! Sweet! *takes*

Voldemort: *hovers over Dumbledore*
Voldemort/Dumbledore shippers: YESSSSS!
Everyone else: *groans*

Voldemort: *shoots lightning*
Emperor Palpatine: Hey, that's my line!

Movie: *ends*
Audience: Nooooooo :(




Until tomorrow, best wishes!
<3 Allison

3 comments:

  1. Ha ha ha ha ha! :)

    THANK YOU.

    ReplyDelete
  2. That was marvelous. I'm a particular fan of the Frodo one, the Angst one, The Palpatine one, and the Draco/Harry shippers one. Also, haven't seen or read HP in a few months, what does her hair foreshadow exactly?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Dude...this is exactly what a blog should be. Kudos!

    ReplyDelete